"'Allo 'Allo!" is a film from 1982. It is mainly comedy, about a French man named Rene, who has a wife and a cafe. The cafe also has several waitresses he has flings with, many many German customers (WWII, the Germans got their hands on France) and also an underground resistance in the basement.

Chaos ensues.

...

Who am I kidding, I haven't watched the bloody film.
But anyway, I found my way onto the quotes page of 'Allo, 'Allo! and god it was worth it. Here are some of my favourites.


[Maria has disguised the airmen as waitresses, so René mimes to them that they must not go upstairs with the Germans]
Flying Officer Carstairs: [turning to Fairfax] What was all that about?
Flying Officer Fairfax: I think he means that if Hitler comes in and wants us to go upstairs with him, we're not to go.
Flying Officer Carstairs: Is he like "that," then?
Flying Officer Fairfax: Oh, yes.
René: [to the others] And they must not speak.
[Rene turns to the airmen and mimes that they must be silent]
Flying Officer Carstairs: What does that mean?
Flying Officer Fairfax: Well, if we do go upstairs with Hitler, we're not to tell anyone.
Flying Officer Carstairs: Well, it's hardly the sort of thing you boast about, is it.


Herr Flick: [to the tune of the Hokey Pokey] You put your right boot in, you take your right boot out, you do a lot of shouting and you shake your fists about. You light a little smokie and you burn down ze town, zat's vot it's all about. Ah, Himmler, Himmler, Himmler...
[cut off by telephone]


Yvette Carte-Blanche: What is happening?
Maria Recamier: We were both aroused by the banging.
Edith: I too was aroused by the banging.
Roger Leclerc: I was aroused when I saw the girls with the candles.


[upon seeing Leclerc's latest disguise]
René: Man of a thousand faces, every one the same.


And btw everytime I see the word 'Allo, I am reminded of this:


NUMA NUMA NUMA YAY.