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itwasinevitable
somehow i can't see what is right before my eyes.
information
narcissist in the mirror
one xREDballoon
is how she signs her name.

She developed a love for fashion, but can't tell the difference between avant garde and a five-year-old's ruined art project. She likes platform shoes with crazy heels, very detailed black lace, truckloads of ruffles, and as many quotes as tumblr can fit. She's a Pisces with an attitude to match, and lives in her own planet with a fourth wall. Famously talks at people without them bothering to listen.

She writes,
and she loves it.

affiliates
I R NOT Sociophobic
`3Loyalty `2Justice `6Affinity `CCHMSGZ

`Aaron `Abigail `Amanda `Ann `Cheryl `Cherlyn `ChewErn `Christina `Claire `Clara `DingYi `Diondra `Eelin `Erin `Ester `Esther `Gekting `Grace `Gretel `HuiMin `HuiXian `Ivy `Jaslyn `Janelle `Javier `Jiahang `Jia Wen `Jia Wei `Joey L. `Joey P. `Joy `Kai Lin `Kai Ping `KarWai `Kelvin `Laura `Leona `Martin `Meng Hao `Nigel `Nixon `Perpetua `Philene `PZY `QiEn `Samantha Y. `Sarah `Shernise `Sheryl `Sili `SiewTing `Steffi `Sylvia `Theodora `Tinghong `Valerie `Veronica `WeiXiong `WenHui `Xiao Meng `Xin Xin `YanZhan `Yiting `ZhiYing

`Doe Deere `Gala Darling `Sea Of Shoes `Luxirare `The Tugboat Complex

memories
the future looks better
July 2007 August 2007 September 2007 October 2007 November 2007 December 2007 January 2008 February 2008 May 2008 June 2008 July 2008 September 2008 October 2008 November 2008 December 2008 January 2009 February 2009 March 2009 April 2009 May 2009 June 2009 July 2009 August 2009 September 2009 October 2009 November 2009 December 2009 January 2010 February 2010
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Friday, October 31, 2008
01:02:00
I want to scream.

but instead of telling myself not to, i think of a whole list of irrelevancy:
why do i want to scream?
who do i think i am to scream at 1am?
what do i want to scream about and what do i think will happen?
do i think my voice can even go that high?




i can't even do things without reasons anymore.
idiot. i need to get a life.

MC is a young man just graduating from HS in a small town. He's shy, studious, and obsessed with Shakespeare and Elizabethan England. He's in the drama club, but stays in the background, doing props and painting sets. He's been accepted into college in NYC with great English and Theatre programs, but his parents expect him to go to the local state school and major in something practical.

On graduation night, while everyone else in their grade parties, MC and his best friend (aka BF) are spending the evening with a smuggled bottle of champagne and a stack of Shakespeare movies. Next thing MC knows, he's in Elizabethan England, inhabiting the body of Jack, a plucky orphan who does menial chores at the Globe Theatre.

MC quickly befriends a seamstress working for the theatre, whom he finds to be similar to his BF, and learns that Jack longs to make his life in the theatre. MC spends the summer as Jack, and winds up as the stage manager for the final performance of the summer season.

He also falls in love with an actor, and makes a real connection with him, but the MC "wakes up" back into his old body and life. The summer has passed in that life, too, and he discovers that Jack has fought the college battle for him with his parents, and that's he's on the verge of leaving for NYC. He comes out to his parents and says goodbye to BF, appreciating her even more now that he's seen how far their friendship really stretches.

In the final chapter, he shows up for his first theatre class at college, and is instantly struck by another student, uncannily similar to the actor.
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Thursday, October 30, 2008
15:31:00
Couldn't make it to the chalet in the end.
crawled out of bed to tell Sili at 11am,
then fell asleep on the granite floor until 5pm.

and I got 15 hours of CIP yesterday! >8D
In return, I only had six hours of sleep, and bloody starved until 12+.

First was rehearsal, which should have taken place smoothly and let all of us finish this three-and-a-half hour affair nicely for lunch.
But guess what happened?
Why, the screechy, shitty chinese drama teacher or course!
She screamed and screamed and screamed at the performers and AVA crew as they were struggling to put up the performances. Big ugly noisy bitch she is.
So we ended late, and had a late debrief and had a late lunch.
At least our lunch was provided. And it was damn damn niceeee!
The bunch of us, stage helpers, runners and I ended up eating in the Grand Audi because we wanted to eat in the teacher's faces.
Then, we discussed about teachers. Loudly.
None of our subjects heard though D:

nearing the end of lunch, we started accusing those who didn't finish their lunch of being wasteful. "The poor children of Africa are starving and you are...!"
The best reply was "If I throw this away, it might end up in Africa for them!" Like, diaaaaooo la! and he was the most wasteful anyway.

Then I slacked for a while, because while they had to be back in the audi at one, I only had to go see Ms Ranita at the staffroom at one fifteen.
Then I had fun cutting up the scripts for cue cards.
Told Xiao Ming to go slack at the Audi with the rest, she was scared off by the teachers -,-;;
then I joined them in the audi for the CL rehearsals. Had to listen to the Bloody Bitch for another couple of hours. Again.
Then, we had dinner at four.
chicken rice.
anybody who has ever had the misfortune of eating outside school with me will know.
I HATE chicken rice. with a passion.
it's the most disgusting food in the whole entire world for me.
except for their cucumbers. the only saving grace i tell you.
but i was saved when Xiao Ming dropped by after gz to see the whole lot of us sitting on the Audi stairs. At least, until we were chased off by some a.p. man.
Then we resumed our lunch table.

Then I had free time until 6pm.
Went to put bags with them in the cdc room and they went to change.
Later escaped with Zoe and Ming to help with makeup.
I'm not regretting giving that guy blue and green eyeshadow.
They were going to give him pink for heaven's sake.
for a guy, blue > pink right?
then I had to go recut the cue cards because Ms Low edited the script -,-'
cut cut paste paste at some teacher's table. Ms Low assigned seating.
Her chair had some really nice cushions though 8D very soft and squishy cushions

Joined the others at the audi later to meet the chinese mc.
we slacked around as they were getting ready for the show.
chatted and walked everywhere. to stage right, then left, then sat down behind the black stage extensions to get ready.
The rest is history.

I still don't like the bleeding spotlight though.
hurts like shit cause they shine it straight in the eye. and it's glaring too.
both Linxi and I got complained by the teachers downstage for hair and shirt.
and Ms Ranita made us pull up our socks during the intermission.
It was also bloody hot on and even behind the stage.

But I have to applaud the sec ones. They had put up a pretty nice show.
and the girls of 1DL chinese group were running in four-inch heels.
and one of them heels were stilettos. and she wore it for the entire play, while running and walking all over the stage. Poor girl.

Went home at 10pm, but I'm so happy about my 15h CIP >D
Had Macs for supper since I sacrificed dinner.
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Sunday, October 26, 2008
15:05:00
homigod I changed my blogskin!!!

yeah, i changed the skin, mainly cause i found out that poor DancingSheep exceeded her bandwidth and the images were all broken >_o and then I realised that i wanted a really really really clean and simple skin to look at, because I'm such a sucker for avante-garde and simplistic designs. In the end, my half-hour browsing and half-hour contemplation brought me down to three choices. Then I decided I liked black, and thus this skin came.

Then I realised that I can put up my music player at last. And so after half a year, my playlist came to some use. It has all of my all-time favourite artists on it la: Panic! at the disco, Gazette, Capsule, Gackt... I think they have Cobra Starship too.

Hey, I listen to some really weird-ass music! But I love all of these tracks, they're all nice and darkish, like the Classic Gothic Fantasy books I used to love. Bram Stoker's Dracula has it's own theme that I give it, you can find it on the playlist. It's "THE END" by Gazette. I forgot the lyrics, but it's sort of like a listish feel to it and it's really broody.

If you like silly songs, take "The Piano Knows Something I Don't".
If you can't take lots of guitar and "engrish"/badly-spoken english, avoid Gazette.
For Techno-y(?) tunes: "Plastic Girl (feat. Eel)"
For Weird Catchy tunes: Anything by Cobra Starship. But I advocate "Prostituition is the World's Oldest Profession (And I, Dear Madame, Am A Professional)"


need I say more?
Yes, it IS a song exactly about the title. Why?
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Saturday, October 25, 2008
00:09:00
murphy's law: everything just seems to go wrong.

i can't believe it took me freaking forever to feel good enough to type up a post. or i'm lazy again as i always am. i think it is of trivial importance what i want to say anyway, but i'm going to tell you since i'm bored and have always tried to prove my unselfishness by sharing.

...

um, i forgot what i wanted to say.

therefore, i shall be nice and generous like i always am and show you something amazing i found on youtube. yes, i am such a fan of dead Captain Jack Sparrow.




oh! some food for thought after I've finished reading a vampire rant:

Taking that the "type" of vampire covered is/was
a) DEAD. but animated and moving.
b) Not in fantasy realms
c) Once a human

here is why there are no such things as "half-vampires".

"...Vampires are not a species. That is to say a creature turned into a vampire in the modern sense isn’t. Never have been and never will be. I’ll explain why soon. There are other creatures in mythology and folklore that lust blood, but this doesn’t make them vampires. I repeat: vampire-like but not a vampire. To ignore this fact is like calling a bear a stork because they both eat fish. I’ll touch on this later – back to what I was saying previously.

In any version of a “vampire” you look at, it is a state of being. Thus a vampire is really just a type of human. So perhaps you can’t call them a species, but you can call them a breed. This is just the tip of the iceberg to why there is no such thing as a “half vampire”."


and he goes even more in-depth!

"To say that a character is a half-vampire is the same as saying that they have half-AIDS. ALL RIGHT. AWESOME! ROCK ON! I HAVE HALF A DISEASE."


take a moment to 'lol' at that please, but i believe it might need clarification.
vampirism = state of being
states of being includes (being) disease(d)
AIDS = disease
therefore, AIDS is similar to vampirism.

get it NOW?


and he goes even further...
covering it in my favourite subject of "genetics" <3

"As a vampire is a state of being (no matter what), they have no non-human genes to pass down to children. Why? First off there are not different breeds of vampire. Perhaps different strains of the supposed disease, but as vampires are not a species, they have no breeds. Rather they are a singular human breed of their own. Any human can become a vampire. A vampire doesn’t have different vampiric genetic makeup to pass on - all they pass on is the infection. Depending on the preference of the author, it is either a disease that affects the living or a disease that affects the dead.

The most common vampires seen in literature are dead. The blood they take into their body is the blood of those they feed from, and it takes up all forms of fluids in their body – tears, sweat, water, and yes – sperm. Saying that vampires can reproduce is like saying zombies can."



and you know zombies, flesh-eating, mindless beings yeah?


"...Vampires can not have saliva – just as they can not have sweat, tears, or sperm. Dead bodies do not produce these things. Hence why there aren't a massive load of vampires. If each person fed off of became a vampire (in the classical sense of death), everyone would be one by now.

As I said before – dead things don’t have sperm (or eggs) so dead things cannot reproduce. The blood they drink runs through all their organs in place of basically all other fluids they had while living. The sperm would have died off at the least."


Of course, this also covers the fact that these are classical vampires.
and not forgetting that this is r-e-a-l-i-t-y and not fantasy.
which is of course, twice as insulting for the very existence of the Cullen family.
and his fans. not forgetting the hoard, not forgetting...

and for you prudes:
"This isn’t to say that vampires cannot have sex. They do have warm blood after feeding and they do retain memory and instinct. However, pardon my crude humour, but if you were to say that a male vampire would be the sire of a half-vampire, all the partners would actually being doing at orgasm is giving the human lady an early period.

A female vampire cannot be a mother even if there actually were any eggs left in her alive. Reason being that all a vampire survives by is blood, so any baby being formed would die very quickly. A growing fetus cannot survive off of human blood much less survive in a dead body. It would just rot in their guts without developing whatsoever."


...yes. what he's trying to say is that the sperm, having been replaced by blood, is non-existent since whatever the poor chap had when he was alive has died with the rest of his body. no the body doesn't digest the blood. i told you, he's fucking dead.

therefore, whatever he ejaculates (if he can, since he's dead and all) will be, well, blood. "Early period", haha.

and recall that we've all learnt how the foetus and mum doesn't share blood. if mummy doesn't even digest this blood consumed, there's no nutrients. she can't feed the poor chap. thus, natural abortion, awww...

and, come on, necrophilia? that's a bit much and we Singapore is a conservative society too!

so why am i telling you this?
well, because my friend and i had a wonderful idea!
or actually, i had the epiphany, she supplied some of the info.

you see, Edward Cullen has a child because he has living-but-frozen sperm.
Edward Cullen, is fucking dead. but reanimated.
Therefore, dead-but-reanimated people will have sperm.
albeit just "frozen", whatever that means.

So, the idea struck:
Aithein and I could open a sperm bank, donating or selling sperm
all provided by the lovely mortuary-dwelling peeps.
aka, harvest them deceased's sperm and distribute them.
they can't complain anyway.


if you aren't laughing at the idea, you obviously:
a) are a prude
b) love Twilight too much
c) have been insulted by me
d) have no sense of humour
e) don't understand (aka your IQ = your shoe size)


aren't I the genius?
well, haha, that's my happy thought for the day.
'Nights all.
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Monday, October 13, 2008
15:40:00


Juggernaut Used for Logical Infiltration and Accurate Nullification


Get Your Cyborg Name



If any of you were ever wondering what Julian meant. Well, you probably didn't, but this is interesting! In a sardonic, caustic manner.



Your result for The Heart Test...

Lonely Heart

You are 30% Independent, 40% Idealistic, 80% Intimate, and 90% Indulgent!



The Lonely Heart

Dependent, Realistic, Intimate, Indulgent


You are the most misunderstood of hearts, the Lonely Heart. Your desire for love and your want of harmony and intimacy are all very loving qualities. At the same time you are very down-to-earth, which may present a more cold or hard demeanor than you actually possess. Your qualities are all of the quieter types, so you may be shy, leading to difficulties in love, which is hard for you, being so caring as you are. You want love, but your realistic nature may work against these more idealistic desires.


Matches for the Lonely Heart:


The Healers's Heart

The Healer's Heart is both realistic and values harmony, just as you do. The Healer is more passionate than you are, but you can appreciate this quality. The Healer in independent, and while you may wish them to dote on you more, you can can appreciate their self-sufficiency. The Healer will always be there for you when you are down, and you will find that they make a wonderful match.


The Patron Saint's Heart

The Patron Saint is, like you, dependent, realistic and values harmony. The Patron Saint will understand your more down-to-earth views as wells as your need for love and want for unity in a relationship. The Patron Saint is more passionate than you are, and this is something you can definitely appreciate. The Patron Saint's protective nature will leave your lonely heart feeling loved, and you will appreciate them watching over you, as well as the fact that they seem to understand you well.



.
Your exact opposite is The Lively Heart.




Avoid Explicits if you can. You need love and the feeling of being loved, and an Explicit may not understand or appreciate this, leading to conflict. Idealists may also be difficult to get along with if you are stubborn. But if you can adapt and appreciate their ways of thinking, a relationship with an Idealist can work.

Take The Heart Test at HelloQuizzy



Hmm... I really should get a life.
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Friday, October 10, 2008
22:22:00
1. Who would you rather get stuck in handcuffs with, Xenia or Aeques?
Probably Xenia. Since she's female, which is always the best option. It's alright, she can talk my ear off it's fine. Really.

2. Who's Aequenn dating?
Ingrid.

3. Katsurou got turned into an animal! What animal is it?
Anything but a bunny. Seriously!
He's probably some retarded mouse if you really want to be accurate.

4. If Zekitsu and Xenia were locked in the same (really small) room for longer than a day, what would most likely happen?
Wow, this generator is wonderful, it picked out the couple! Uh, Zekitsu gets so tired of Xenia's talking he falls asleep... and then... Xenia can find some use for her little Sharpie markers...

5. If Kichirou were to be mistaken for a celebrity, who would it be?
Nobody!

6. Describe Iriel in one word.
Hahaha, BITCHY.

7. What is Reisa's favorite TV show or movie?
"The eyes are the nipples of the face~!" It has to be House Bunny.

8. If Aeques and Zekitsu teamed up, what would they most likely accomplish?
They will take over the world. And have a sincere heart-to-heart talk about Aeques' mother/Zekitsu's wife and whether Prozac is a good cure of not.

9. Do you do anything special with Valkyrie Rinelth?
"I can't get her skirt right! I'm pissed at you!"
Yes, I actually fret over her clothing.

10. What was your first impression of Shiroi?
Airhead. But she's a nice airhead, if that helps!

11. If Valkyrie Rinelth played in a movie, what kind of character would they play?
"The Ring is not a toy, Frodo!"
A Gandalfy character with all the answers and badass powers.

12. What would you do if you hadn't met Aequenn?
I wouldn't have created Ingrid.
Or dreamt of his three other brothers and their insane names. "Sylph", "Elphira" xD

13. What song could be Iriel's theme song?
"Headstrong" - Trapt

14. How do your and Xenia's talents add up?
Oh pretty good...?

15. What's Reisa's opinion on cheese?
"What's this squishy thing? You mean it's edible? Oh.. uh.."

16. Would you open a mystery gift Aeques just gave you, without much hesitation?
He wouldn't give a present, but sure, why not?
It's probably a carriage clock though.

17. What would Kichirou not be caught dead in?
A dress. Particularly one his brother once wore.

18. How would Katsurou insult Aequenn?
"You.. You red-haired idiot!"
"Say what you green-haired bitch? Didn't catch that last bit..."

19. Would you marry Shiroi?
EW, NO.

20. Zekitsu suddenly knows all your secrets. What do you have to say about that?
"Oh... shit."
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14:25:00
[x] Both of your parents are from Asia
[x] You were born in Asia
[ ] You use the term “Azn”
[x] You think DDR is cool
[x] You’ve watched lots of anime
[ ] You like Korean dramas
[ ] You have stuff hanging on your phone
[ ] Your parents want you to marry within your own race
[x] You eat rice almost everyday
[x] You drink lemon tea

X’s so far: 6

[x] You style your hair
[ ] You have a bebo/myspace/friendster
[x] You speak languages other than English
[x] Your parents are strict
[x] Your parents have high expectations of you
[x] You know your multiplication table
[x] You play badminton or table tennis
[ ] You’ve seen the Asian version The ring/The grudge

X’s so far: 12

[x] You go/​want to go to a unive​rsity​ and would​ NEVER​ consi​der an apprentice ship
[x] You own an Asian car (Honda, Toyota, etc)
[x] You’re not the only child
[x] You’ve gotten little red envelopes around February
[x] You know the difference between kung fu, karate and tae kwon do
sometimes, but not that’s not the case.

x’s so far: 16

[x](If you’​re a girl) ​​You prefe​r white​ guys over Asian​ guys (If you’​​re a guy) You prefer Asian girls
[x] your mothe​r tries​ to barga​in even thoug​h the produ​ct is alrea​dy discounted
[x] You can do the rubiks cube
[x] You have a box of noodles somewhere in your house
[x] You play video games/computer games

X’s so far: 21

[x] Every​time you’​​re going​ out your paren​ts ask you where​ you’​​re going and what time you’ll be home
[x] You have karaoke at home
[x] You know BOA/Gazette/Ayumi Hamasaki/Gackt
[ ] You’ve been to a LAN more than 3 times
[x] You have incense sticks/moth balls in your house
[x] You own a gaming console
[x] You play a musical instrument
[x] You don’t wear shoes in your house
[x] You can use chopsticks
[x] You get nothing if you do well in school, but punished if you don’t

X’s so far: 30

[x] Your parents won’t let you go out if you have school the next day
[x] You have Asian songs on your computer/iPod
[x] You don’t like football
[x] You have a curfew
[ ] You know what ulzzang/tb means
[ ] You know what purikura is
[x] You like bubble tea
[ ] Your paren​ts bough​t you shoes​ many sizes​ too big so you can “​​grow into it” and wear it for years to come
[x] You’ve played final fantasy
[ ] You believe in fortune cookies

X’s so far: 36

[ ] You know what bok choy is
[x] You’ve heard the song “Got rice?”
[x] You have a tutor
[x] You’ve had pockys/yan yan befor​e
[x] When you seek for your mothe​r’​​s permi​ssion​ she repli​es “Ask your dad”
[ ] You like pho
[x] You play the piano
[x] When your parents are yelling at you they repeat what they already said
[ ] Your parents watch shows or movies from the country they are from
[x] You can do math in your head
[x] You actually tie your shoe laces instead of tucking them in your shoes
[ ] You have chinky eyes

Total​ X’s: 45

Your total​ x 2
Result: 90% Asian

Whoa =DD

EXAMS ARE OVER RAWR!

went to watch house bunny yesterday and it was so uber nice!
though the commercials were good too, i mean, look at the Chihuahua movie darnnit! i've seen the ad before, but this version is cuter! like how many people have chichuahuas singing at the Aztec ruins?

okay, let's ignore the fact that the Aztecs used to eat dogs. i am sadistic, yeah.

but Anna Faris/Shelley was absolutely bimbo! she's absolutely spazzy and vapid and airhead. and when someone told her "you're so vapid" she said "oh, thank you! you're like the 100th person to tell me that!" diao moment, but uber cute!

i don't like my clothing. but it saved me from roasting out in the sun =D tanlines!

I still have the neoprints with me, i look terrible in them. my eyes look all huge and wonky like an alien's, and there was one where the camera got me by surprise. everybody was looking good, and then you see my face there and it completely says "hur? =B" yuck. ick. ew.

but it was fun. we found a cosplay shop!!!
but their kisame isn't blue, it's skin colour rawr! what kind of @#%#%^$ shark is beige?! and hey have this fako sharingan ring which i loled at. come on, Itachi's ring reads 'red' not 'black circles'. stupid fans. and they had the D. Gray-man costumes, which were half an inch thick. that i tried on. it was cool, but for a moment, i looked like a guy. i looked in the mirror and went "... I look like a kanda Yuu wannabe failure." mostly because of the hair which was in half a high ponytail. Like Yuu. but the coat is too big raaaawr. Then i realised i picked out the male Exorcist uniform, which was fine really since i don't reeeeeally like the female uniform. they even had silver buttons!! =O

Rachel tried on the Vampire night's Day Class Uniform, i was telling her we should get her the bamboo-pole-thing Yuki uses as her weapon for her. rachel added that Yuki was a bitch. Mentally, i was screaming, "KANAME KURAN IS THE BITCH NOT @%$@^#^ YUKI!" but haha i guess. shojou manga = bitch parade.


That's why Julian reads Shounen manga. because they have gorgeous characters like Itachi and Kanda and Sebastian and... uh... others.
no that does not include the Konoha Whore and his best friend.

aah, sianz, doodling with my tablet and having fun =D

shoo!
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